If God has asked you to be faithful in a difficult marriage, then this is the blog for you!

Risking it all.

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I remember getting on the plane leaving Oregon and moving to Michigan. Darin was already here, his new job had moved him here about 4 months prior. My Dad took Macy Mae and I to the airport and as we left he whispered in my ear how proud he was, how I was much braver than he was, and that he knew God was with me.

Darin and I had been separated on and off for 6 to 7 of the 9 years we had been married at the time. As I have told you I filed for legal separation, later he did file for a divorce but it was never finalized.

So here I was with Macy sitting in that plane. I was completely exhausted and emotionally spent.  I felt as if I just won a war. I was leaving a huge support system and going into so much uncertainty yet I felt so much peace. The peace that passeth understanding. I knew I was doing exactly what God had asked me to do.

While sitting there I remembered the story God reminded me of my last Sunday in church. It was the story of Samuel. Much like Macy Mae he was a prayed for baby. He was a miracle. His mother promised God that if He would give her a son she would dedicate his life to God and when he was weaned he would live with the priest and serve the Lord his entire life.

Much like my story she was putting her precious baby in harms way. Priest Eli was not a very good priest and he had 2 sons that had no regard for the things of God. By now Darin had given his life back to God but there was so much unknown, so many very serious issues we still had to work out. Voices would come in my head and say would if it doesn’t work? What if Macy bonds with Darin and then everything falls apart and at age 6, 7, or 8 and you have to put her on a plane  back to Oregon?  Then I thought of Hannah, how brave she was, and I prayed her powerful prayer over our precious daughter.

Hannah’s Prayer: I Samuel 2

Then Hannah prayed and said:

“My heart rejoices in the LORD;
in the LORD my horn is lifted high.
My mouth boasts over my enemies,
for I delight in your deliverance.

“There is no one holy like the LORD;
there is no one besides you;
there is no Rock like our God.

“Do not keep talking so proudly
or let your mouth speak such arrogance,
for the LORD is a God who knows,
and by him deeds are weighed.

“The bows of the warriors are broken,
but those who stumbled are armed with strength.
Those who were full hire themselves out for food,
but those who were hungry are hungry no more.
She who was barren has borne seven children,
but she who has had many sons pines away.

“The LORD brings death and makes alive;
he brings down to the grave and raises up.
The LORD sends poverty and wealth;
he humbles and he exalts.
He raises the poor from the dust
and lifts the needy from the ash heap;
he seats them with princes
and has them inherit a throne of honor.

“For the foundations of the earth are the LORD’s;
on them he has set the world.
He will guard the feet of his faithful servants,
but the wicked will be silenced in the place of darkness.

“It is not by strength that one prevails;
those who oppose the LORD will be broken.
The Most High will thunder from heaven;
the LORD will judge the ends of the earth.

“He will give strength to his king
and exalt the horn of his anointed.”

If you read on to what happens to Samuel in that ungodly place you will be surprised to see how God protects him. There are times when God purposely puts us in harms way to fulfill a purpose. A purpose we cannot often see in the moment and might not see until we get to Heaven. As a mother I had to trust this. I was loaded full of morphine (grace).

So the plane lands in Michigan. Macy and I get off and Darin and Lilly are waiting for us at the airport. Macy was so happy to see Darin she ran screaming to him. Lilly was in the car and she was so happy to see us. We get in the car drive to our little house that Darin had found for us and as we pull up Macy says, “Is this our new home?” I said yes it is Macy. Yes it is!

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