The third dream God gave me I believe was to comfort me in my loneliness. Keeping my heart focused on how God was my comfort not Darin or anyone else. Darin would never be able to comfort me like God could. No human can ever do that for us.
Out of all the dreams God gave me this is the most unusual but I can tell you even sitting here writing about it I can still feel the comfort of the Holy Spirit. It reminds me of the verse in the Bible where Jesus is speaking to his disciples about how the Holy Spirit would come and be our comforter after Jesus went to be with the Father.
“All this I have told you so that you will not fall away. They will put you out of the synagogue; in fact, the time is coming when anyone who kills you will think they are offering a service to God. They will do such things because they have not known the Father or me. I have told you this, so that when their time comes you will remember that I warned you about them. I did not tell you this from the beginning because I was with you, but now I am going to him who sent me. None of you asks me, ‘Where are you going?’ Rather, you are filled with grief because I have said these things. But very truly I tell you, it is for your good that I am going away. Unless I go away, the Advocate (Comforter) will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you. When he comes, he will prove the world to be in the wrong about sin and righteousness and judgment: about sin, because people do not believe in me; about righteousness, because I am going to the Father, where you can see me no longer; and about judgment, because the prince of this world now stands condemned.
“I have much more to say to you, more than you can now bear. But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all the truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will glorify me because it is from me that he will receive what he will make known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine. That is why I said the Spirit will receive from me what he will make known to you.”
I had this dream early in the morning seconds before I got up to get ready for work. I was sleeping on my stomach and as I was waking up I felt something laying on top of me completely holding me. It felt as if my heart and entire body were being completely embraced.
I feel in my heart the Holy Spirit himself came to comfort every fiber of my body, soul, and spirit.
The night before I did not feel lonely at all. I had had far more difficult and lonely days before this but the Holy Spirit must have known I needed His comfort.
Three other ways I fought for my marriage:
Expectations can completely derail your Faith. I put my expectations of Darin on the shelf. I set them there and walked away. Telling them to Stand Down! God had to really help me in this area of my life. This was critical in my fight for our marriage. This is one of the reasons why I didn’t talk to many people about our issues because I found everyone else had expectations for my marriage too. This can be very hurtful and distracting to you and others.
Also I did not read books that had any romance in them. I knew even Christian books could cause me to put unrealistic expectations on myself and Darin.
Another thing that happened during this time is through the grape vine I heard about a couple who started having very serious marriage problems. Normally this is not a big deal but I happened to know this man and knew he thought I was attractive, not in a wrong sinful way but I knew this to be the case, nonetheless. I will tell you I was not attracted to him but attracted to the feelings of wanting someone to think I was attractive since this was one of the things lacking in my marriage at the time. In the midst of this trial I believe Satan himself came to use this to derail and distract my faith.
The weekend I found out about this marriage having problems I called my counselor, left a message for her on Sunday, cancelled all my appointments I had scheduled the following day and met with her on Monday. I did not let one day go by. I knew this was the enemy throwing darts of distraction my way.
When I met with my counselor and told her what was going on in my head she said to me, Julie you are very wise. We then prayed together and God took that arrow out of my back!