I remember the day God began to teach me to use the Bible as a weapon.
Darin and I had been fighting. A better explanation is he was not doing what I thought he should be doing and I had been yelling at him. Again I found myself desperate to change the situation but I couldn’t. I did not know how. It was like living on a roller coaster without breaks! If you have been there you know exactly what I’m talking about. Reminds me of the latter part of
James 1:6
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind. That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord. Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.
That was me, I was being blown and tossed by the wind and so unstable. I was not looking to the Word for practical answers and I was not using the Word as my primary weapon.
I was at our house in Tillamook and I was pleading with God to show me how to act and what to say. I remember saying out loud,” I don’t know how to act Lord!” Thinking in my heart, You told me to stay and trust you but I don’t know how to act! I heard a knock on the door. It was our previous neighbor that had moved to a neighboring city about 6 months prior. She was a Jehovah Witness and she would stop by periodically to drop off tracks. She was a good friend so I would let her in and we would visit. It was this friend that gave Macy her favorite blanket that Macy named ‘Binkie’.
We visited for a bit, she knew about our struggles and had a daughter that had similar struggles and as she was walking out the door she said, “You know there is a verse in 1 Peter that could really help you.”
This is the verse: 1 Peter 3:1-6
Wives, in the same way submit yourselves to your own husbands so that, if any of them do not believe the word, they may be won over without words by the behavior of their wives, when they see the purity and reverence of your lives. Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as elaborate hairstyles and the wearing of gold jewelry or fine clothes. Rather, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is of great worth in God’s sight. For this is the way the holy women of the past who put their hope in God used to adorn themselves. They submitted themselves to their own husbands, like Sarah, who obeyed Abraham and called him her lord. You are her daughters if you do what is right and do not give way to fear.
She opened up her Jehovah Witness Bible and began to read that verse to me. It was in that moment I began to understand the power of the Word of God.
Suddenly I knew exactly how to act, exactly what to pray, and exactly how to stand. I was safe as long as I did exactly what the Bible was telling me.I was no longer being tossed here there and everywhere with my emotions and my actions.
Even at the beginning of writing this blog I questioned the consequences of being so confident. Voices coming to my head, “who says you’re an expert?” Then I looked down at my Bible that was opened to Isaiah 50:4-5. Suddenly I realized it is God that has instructed my tongue and I will not draw back!